Twilight Saga

Fuck you Stephanie Meyer, Bobby Pattinson, and Kristen No-emotion for proving that you don't need good story, good acting, or living semen to make a successful vampire movie you stupid twatcicles........ team Buffy mother fuckers!!

Many apologies

Sorry we've been out of comission for a while now but stay tuned of a bunch of new shit including reviews of the Last Airbender, Tha A-Team, Iron Man 2, Inception, Get Him to The Greek, and others that I can't think of right now

Alice In Wonderland

 Well, I'm not sure where to start. Tim Burton could have done a better job, but I guess he had to be less of a Wack Job for Disney's main audience, the kids. However, there was this one part where the tough mouse guy poked out the Blabbersnatche's (or whatever's) eye which may fuck with a child's mind, but I don't know, I enjoyed gore and shit like that when I was little.
There was lots of familiar voices, but probably were not the best choice for the character. Such as the caterpillar. Who was spoken by Professor Snape from Harry Potter. He sounded the exact same just in case you were wondering how he would sound in wonderland. Nothing changed.

   So I'm sure everyone built this movie up in their minds to be something "Dark" and "Mind Blowing". I did for a second, then I saw the trailer and lost all hope. Johnny Depp did a good job I guess, It wasn't anything amazing. I'm not a huge fan of the British, so of course I did not like whoever played Alice. Stupid British bitch. Oh and her fiance was disgusting. He was a GINGER-BRIT, I almost threw up. It was better than Where the Wild Things Are though, so that's a plus. It could have been better I'm sure if Disney let Tim Burton do as many drugs as he wanted.
Overall, I did not like it, but I was alright. There is a slight possibility of me watching it again, only if it's free. There was way too much C.G.I. Almost all the props were computer generated, one of the actors even had to have him be animated to ride his horse away, the horse was not animated the whole time.So, either get better, Tim Burton, or FUCK OFF!

Brick

This was probably one of the coolest movies i ever accidentally stumbled on. Its all about this kid who's ex girlfriend, and love of his life, gets murdered and he tries to find her killer by infiltrating the local drug scene. The coolest thing about this movie is that it was put together to be like an old Dick Tracey type murder mystery, its got a lot a strange lingo that you really gotta think about when you hear it and when people talk i keep expecting them to say "Nyah See" like chief Wiggum on the Simpsons. The acting is great, the story is solid, and its got some of those twists i love so much. This show is excellent and i highly recommend it to anyone and everyone

Memento! yeah that's right

Ok, every time i watch this movie it gets better and better. This picture made its start at the Sundance Film Festival and stars Guy Pearce and Joe Pantoliano. Basically, without giving anything away its the story of a man with no short term memory trying to find his wife's killer. This movie keeps you going "what the fuck" every like five minutes, in a good way. It keeps you guessing, has entertaining narration the likes of which are nearly Tarantino worthy, and is just twist after tantalizing twist. This is one of those movies i highly recommend to anyone who's in the mood for an intense thriller, probably when you can pay attention cuz its a film where the details do matter.

Indiana Jones 4

WILL NEVER EXIST!

King Arthur, a very underated movie

I'm surprised that not many people have seen this film. It was produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, the score was written by the great Hans Zimmer, its cast includes Kiera Knightly and Cliver Owens, and yet NO ONE has even seen it. First of all Kiera Knightly is sexy as hell (she has probably some of the most sensual facial expressions i've ever seen), secondly its very action packed, thirdly the score is great, and lastly the acting is just great. Action, adventure, romance, betrayal, loyalty, martyrdom, and one guy who's got this wicked pair or brass knuckles with with dagger on them. Plus i love a good period piece. So go watch it fuckers! Especially you Tyson